An Open Letter To Certain Male Geeks

Greetings, geeks! My name is Bea. I'm (as of last week-ish) 32 years old. I'm a college graduate. I work in social services. I bake. I knit. I read (a lot). I vote Democrat. I occasionally sparkle. I enjoy the works of Jane Austen, thunderstorms, the Oxford comma, and the laughter of children.

Oh, I'm also a geek. I've been a geek since I was a tiny little girl and I had a Dune coloring book. This Dune coloring book, actually. I also had a glow-in-the-dark He-Man sword when I was itty-bitty that I had to take in the bathroom to watch glow because I was never awake when it was dark outside. Because I was four. Later, I was a huge She-Ra fan and literally subscribed to her newsletter. I loved Star Wars, Blade Runner, The Terminator, Wonder Woman, The Incredible Hulk, The V miniseries (both of them!), Legend, The Dark Crystal, The NeverEnding Story, Dune (the Lynch version, NEVER the Sci-Fi version, though that was much later), Labyrinth, and Conan the Barbarian. The 80s were fun, weren't they?

I was a gamer girl in the late 80s and early 90s. Look. You think it's tough being a gamer girl now? (It is, I'm sure.) Try it then. I was LITERALLY the only girl I knew who played video games. Ever. I don't play anymore but I can still fuck you up at Super Mario Bros. 1-3. My parents took me and my brother to a Nintendo Convention in Valley Forge, PA as a birthday gift. I'm guessing it was 1990 or 1991. Whatever year Super Mario Bros. 3 came out. I remember because I smoked some dude at a demo of the game. He clearly wasn't expecting that from a little girl. It was AWESOME.

I've watched The X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, Doctor Who, Space: Above and Beyond, VR-5, Harsh Realm, Dead at 21, Love and Curses, Forever Knight, Beauty and the Beast, Dark Shadows (the old 60s soap AND the early 90s remake), Mystery Science Theater 3000, Twin Peaks, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Farscape, The Twilight Zone, The Outer Limits, Heroes, Roar, Dark Angel, Supernatural, Fringe, Roswell, Alias, Earth 2, Dark Skies, Millennium, Kindred: The Embraced, and SeaQuest DSV.

I've read Heinlein and Herbert. I've read all the Lord of the Rings books. I own the extended editions of all the movies AND the Trivial Pursuit game.

Sorsha and I have a zombie apocalypse plan and seriously. It's awesome. It's getting better by the day.

I read comic books. I go to cons. Got my picture taken with Michael Berryman. I saw The Dark Knight in the theater four times. I have the Iron Man Mr. Potato Head, Tony Starch sitting on top of my television. I have a Matchbox-sized replica of the Metallicar on my desk. My mousepad features a kingly Aragorn. I'm currently knitting a Gryffindor scarf.

As you can see from the above exhaustive list, I will watch/read/consume ANYTHING sci-fi/horror/fantasy-related. Regardless of quality as you can also see from the above list. Heh. I can authoritatively nerd out on a variety of subjects. And I do. Often. And I do all of these things despite the INCREDIBLE HANDICAP OF A PAIR OF BREASTS. SHOCKING, RIGHT?!

But seriously, you guys. (And not ALL geek guys, of course.) Can you please stop acting like you own the field of geekery all on your own? Aren't we past this? Seriously? Are we really still OMG STUNNED when a woman enjoys nerdy pursuits? I don't do these things because my boyfriend reads comics and I want him to like me.

For example, I listen to The Nerdist podcast every week. Twice a week if it's on twice. I love it. It's awesome. It's my favorite podcast. I love Chris Hardwick. He's hilarious. But Chris. Dude. I AM NOT THE ONLY WOMAN WHO LISTENS TO YOUR SHOW. THERE ARE FEMALE GEEKS. IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN, YOU'RE DATING ONE. So why do you keep making comments about how no women listen to your show or how your nerdiness is losing you female viewers. Um. We do and it's not. KNOCK IT OFF. My ovaries do not "dry up" when James Gunn and Jonah Ray get into a nerd fight over whether or not 28 Days Later qualifies as a zombie film. That was AWESOME. (My opinion: it does count as a zombie movie.)

I was listening today to a review of the Game of Thrones miniseries. (3 days, you guys!!!!) And the reviewer made a comment about it possibly being a turn-off for women because it's all male-dominated, bloody and full of ultra-violence. Riiiiiiiiiiiight. Because Dany and Arya and Catelyn and Sansa are just standing around, looking pretty. (Well, ok, Sansa is.) Because women can't stand watching male characters. (If we felt that way, we wouldn't watch anything, ever.) Because women don't like to watch dudes with swords fuck shit up. Especially because women don't enjoy a complex, well-told story. Mmm-hmmm.

Oh for Christ's sake, Terrance Zdunich: YES. GIRLS DO READ COMIC BOOKS. I even bought your creepy comic book about cockroaches.

I guess I'm mostly just tired of being told I don't exist.

ETA: This. Thanks, Sorsha. WHATEVER.

In Response to "A Short Play Concerning Motherhood, Woes and WebMD"

As proof that I'm not the lone craze in this tangeld web of friendship, I offer the following story:


About six months ago I was a [relatively] normal and would make [slightly] rational decisions. That all changed the day that Lady Bea called me up using her hyper-excited voice and told me to turn on "Criminal Minds" a show that I don't usually watch. Despite my groanings that the only TV I watch is stupid comedies, I was convinced to turn it on with promises of "Jaaaammmeessss Vaaaannn Der Beeeeeeek" - done; I started to watch.

The episode (well, episodes because it was a two-parter) was about a computer tech (James VanDerBeek) who would help people with computer issues and then start watching them via their webcam and, of course, go and murder them when they did something "ungodly".

Flashforward about four months to me sending help-request emails to the makers of LeapFrog because Glow Bug's Leapster 2 isn't working. It took about a week, but the helpdesk discovered that the toy had a defective part. It was at this point that I received this email:

Ms. Dennis:

In response to your problem, our analysis confirms that the SD card on your Leapster2 is not formatted correctly. Please provide your mailing address and a replacement will be shipped to you immediately.

Beau was excited: what great customer service! They identified the problem and were willing to fix it for free. I, however, had the realization that this was a bit too much like a certain episdode of Criminal Minds and therefore had a much different reaction.

Beau: Well, that's pretty cool. Now we don't have to buy anything.

ME: Yeah, but....they want our home address.

Beau: Yeah, that's generally how how the postal service works.

ME: But...

Beau: But what?

ME: What if this is some sort of creep who's going to take our addess and then stalk and kill us?

Beau: ...

ME: Omigod, we have a webcam! BEAU!! (at this point I disappear to the tool closet to get electric tape)

Beau: Babe, what the hell are you doing?

ME: Covering up the webcam lens!! Oh my God! He could be watching us right now!!

Beau (mutes the TV and turns to face me): Seriously?

ME: Look, Bea and I watched this show...

Beau: Oh, here it comes...

ME: ...and this computer help desk guy would get customer's information and then KILL THEM

Beau: Oh that's realistic

ME: It was!!!! I'm putting down your mother's address.

Beau: No you're not. Put down ours, but use my name rather than yours. Did the boogie man on TV kill men, too?

ME: I don't remember. Probably. Did I mention that this killer was played by Dawson?

Beau: ....

ME: James VanDerBeek!!

Beau: Yeah, I got that. I'm just waiting for you to hear yourself.



Long story short (too late!) I used Beau's name and in 7-10 business days the package came. The killer, however, did not. Yet.

A Most Important Query.

My fellow bloggers/readers, please help settle a disagreement between Sorsha and myself. What is the funniest movie ever: Airplane! or Spaceballs?

Now, I understand you may have another movie that is not one of the two aformentioned films that you (incorrectly!) deem Funniest. Movie. Ever. I ask that you please refrain from choosing one of those. I will put up a post for that later, I promise. For now, I want to settle the Airplane! vs. Spaceballs Death Match. Thank you for your time.

If you read this blog, please ring in with your vote. This is perhaps the first major disagreement that Sorsha and I have had! Oh, and I won't mention just yet who prefers which movie as I don't want to inappropriately influence your vote. (Though if you know me reasonably well, you probably already know where my loyalty lies!)

Foiled Again! (No, I Haven't Been Fencing.)

I am a huge music fan. I buy a lot of music, mainly from iTunes. Unless I want the whole CD, then I'll buy the whole thing. But I am a huge addict for buying a song here and there from iTunes. But sometimes, just sometimes, the songs I WANT aren't AVAILABLE. Then I have a tantrum. Here are the top 5 songs that I want to download that iTunes doesn't have:

• "Backwater" by The Meat Puppets. There's a bunch of OTHER Meat Puppets stuff on iTunes. But not "Too High To Die," the album with this song. Come on! It takes me straight back to early high school! But in a good way!
  
• "The Book of Love" by Peter Gabriel. Oh sure, it's available for download on iTunes...if you want to pay $9.99 and get the whole "Shall We Dance" soundtrack. And I sure don't. Grrr. This song was used to lovely effect on the Scrubs finale. I linked it there. Mame will weep. Don't worry, dear Mame. It made me cry too.
  
• "Ruins" by George Is Jones. This song was used on the Everwood* finale, oh so many years ago. I've never been able to find it, nor heard much from that band. All I could find was an emo fanvid about Amy Abbott. So...enjoy that.
  
• "Safe and Sound," Kyosuke Himuro featuring Gerard Way. Yes, Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance, otherwise known as my favorite band that I take no ending of mockery for. Whatever, can't get the song. Himuro's website says that I can but this is a lie. A vicious lie.
  
• "Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want," by The Dream Academy. It's an instrumental cover of The Smiths' song. It's the song playing in Ferris Bueller's Day Off when they're in the museum. Gorgeous rendition of an already awesome song.

If any of our devoted readers do know where I can get any of these songs (Legally!), feel free to let me know!
*Shut it, Andie. Everwood was an awesome show and you just don't GET IT. Neener.

What is WRONG with me?!

Today I gave my coworker Corey a tutorial of which Jonas brother is which and how old they are. While holding up the copy of Seventeen* magazine that features them on the cover.

I...WHY DO I KNOW THIS? WHYYYYYYY?!?!? I feel like I can somehow blame Perez Hilton for this.

I feel sure of it.

*We get it at the office. I don't have a subscription, I swear. Seventeen used to be a great magazine for teenage girls. You know, back when I was a teenager. I remember they used to have great articles about things like abortion rights, sexual harassment and drugs. They used to have that great "Sex and Your Body" column. Yeah, not so much anymore. It's all Jonas brothers and makeup tips. And New and Different Ways to Hate Your Body. Sorry, current teenage girls. Sucks to be you.

Never Thought I'd Say *This*

Good job, Iowa.
Way to go, old-money, blue-blood, Maine, Massachusetts, and Vermont.
But really California? REALLY? Home of San Francisco, the porn industry, and Liberace? REALLY?

Hey California!

Fuck. You.

I Firmly Believe In A Ruling Class...

...Especially since I rule. Just a quick note for those who are poorly socialized -- rude comments do not get posted on this blog. We have comment moderation for a reason. (Mostly, it's so Mame or I don't miss comments on older entries. But it becomes handy when people are douches.) The only rude comments that get posted are from me and Auntie Mame. Anyone else? They get rejected and we tell all our friends and we all laugh about it.

Particularly if they are anonymous. Don't like it? Go fucking read something else.

Got it?

So...I Thought The Internet Was For Porn?

I'm...watching knitting videos on Youtube. This one, to be exact. Can anyone tell me why as soon as I actually start knitting that my stitches get too tight for me to do more than like, three? WHY? And then I start shrieking. Clearly, I'm doing something wrong.

E.T.A.: AHA! Ok, like, 25 minutes later, I think I've figured it out! Mostly by doing what I was pretty sure was the WRONG way to do it. I was bringing the right-hand needle through the wrong way. Knitting the George Costanza way! If it feels wrong, it's right!

Jesus Ain't Down With That Shit. (I Hope.)

This past weekend, I saw two movies: Revolutionary Road (meh) and Milk as part of my Oscar Tour 2009. Anyway, I really enjoyed Milk and saw it with a very fun, receptive, reactive crowd. (That's how I like my movie-going audiences. I don't want dead silence, I want gasping and cheering and advice tossed at the screen. As long as it's related to the film at hand, I'm cool with it. It's Jersey, you kind of have to be!) At one point during Milk, they introduce the odious Anita Bryant, showing some old footage of her singing a hymn. As soon as a woman singing about Jesus appeared on the screen, everyone in the theater groaned and shook their heads or threw their hands up. Even I did this.

Now maybe some people watching the movie were specifically reacting to Bryant but I wasn't. I had only the vaguest notion of who she is before watching Milk and certainly didn't know her on sight and I doubt many of my fellow moviegoers did either. (Which is as it should be. That horrible woman should fade into absolute obscurity, only to be trotted out for mocking purposes. But I digress.) I was reacting to the fact that a religious person had been put in front of me in a movie and my knee-jerk reaction was that this could only mean bad things for these characters. I was right, of course, Milk and his team spend most of the second half of the film batting policies supported by Bryant and bigots like her. Polices that would make it legal to discriminate against people based on their sexual orientation, to fire gay teachers, you know, awesome things like that. And the usual rhetoric about how gays are trying to "recruit" kids in the their sick gay gayness. (Seriously? HAHAHAHA. These people would be hilarious if they weren't so hateful.)

Anyway, it really bothered me that I had that reaction. I'm a person of a faith, a Christian. Specifically, I attend Quaker meetings. I go almost every Sunday and I help out with the First Day School. And it pisses me off that I usually have to qualify the admission of my religion with some kind of explanation that I'm not a judgmental freak. It doesn't make me pissed at the people to whom I'm explaining it, the ones who automatically start to back away, but at the people who act like total dicks in the service of God. Why have we let them* hijack religion? And by "we," I mean, reasonable people of faith. The people who don't give a shit who you have a sex with or marry as long as everyone is over 18 and consenting. The people who don't care what women do with their bodies, whether it's birth control, abortion or sex. The people who aren't terrified of science or evolution. The people who don't give a shit if you're an atheist or some other religion. Basically, people who aren't horrified by "otherness" and hide behind Jesus in terror. It really makes me angry that people with what I feel are VERY extreme views are the ones who try to speak for Christians, who perpetuate bigotry and censorship and misogyny in the name of God. Hey, conservative Christians? YOU DO NOT SPEAK FOR ME. AND YOU NEVER WILL. To semi-quote John Bender from The Breakfast Club, you don't even know my language!

I don't really have a solution to this. I guess I can just continue being a non-asshole person of faith. Well. I'm still kind of an asshole. Just not about being a Christian. Well. Not in this very specific way. Heh.

*And I don't mean people that merely hold more conservative views that I do. I know I'm pretty goddamn liberal. Many of my friends and family members are more conservative than I am and that's not a bad thing. I don't expect everyone to be like me. That would be...boring. I'm talking about scary people like Bryant (though apparently she's mellowed with age or something) and Fred Phelps (Remember him? Gay people caused Hurricane Katrina, didn't you know?) and those like them. The ones who are in the public eye and say detestable things and act like they have God's stamp of approval.

FITA Revealed...Or, after 2 years it's about time

Kevin Smith once said that the characters he writes into his stories and scripts are the kinds he wishes he had in the real world: they talk in long soliloquies, and they have a vast knowledge of pop culture. If I were to create the world I wish I lived in, it would be written much like that of the infamous VC Andrews book, Flowers in the Attic. Movements would be “spin around with their legs flashing through a thin negligee.” There would be face-cupping and the swelling of “rigid male sex”. Teenage girls will wish for things like, "Let me have all those swelling curves that men desire." Every breath would be “aghast” and every uncle would be fucking hot.
Wait. Is that weird?

In my world, however, the protagonist wouldn’t be quite so whiney. Catherine Dollanganger (Cathy - the narrator) had a hard life I’ll give her that, but her gratuitous use of the word “daddy” when referencing her father, and her constant complaining about everything anyone does good for her makes me want to Chuck-Norris-Kick her most of the time.

We all know the story: Cathy and her siblings get locked in an attic because her Mother is an fucking retard and presumably doesn’t understand math, so when their father dies she decides to move in with her emotionally and physically abusive, albeit rich, parents.

If I were Cathy and Momma told me of this plan, I would have had the common sense to argue the following points:

• Problem number one: the grandparents live in a house called “Foxworth Hall.” Nothing good has EVER happened in a house with a name that ends in “Hall.” Or “Manor” for that matter. Nothing. Ok, maybe Toad Hall.
• Problem number two: Cathy has NEVER heard of grandparents then all of a sudden they are off to not just visit but live there? Really?
• Problem number three: The kids are told that they have to ‘hide’ in the house because old granddad is sick. Really Mom? Hide in the attic? How ‘bout you just scrub up and start flipping some damn burgers at McDonalds? Oh I get it. You’re too good for that. But you aren’t too good to f your uncle, have his kids, lock them in your parents’ house, and then slowly starve and kill them off? Huh.

Now I understand that Cathy couldn't have foreseen quite all that, but still! -that’s what happens.

Did I mention that the grandmother, Olivia, announces that Cathy's parents, Corrine and Christopher, Sr., were really uncle and niece? Because she did. Then she calls the Cathy and her siblings (older brother Christopher, and the younger twin boy and girl) the "Devil’s Spawn" and pours tar into Cathy’s hair forcing her to cut it short and Christopher, Jr. to pee in it to loosen the tar. Hilarity!

So whatever, they spend a lot of time in the attic that adjoins their room. Now let’s talk about this attic. This attic isn’t like the crouch down split-level attic at my mother, Joan’s, place. No, this attic is an entire floor of treasures! What a happy coincidence, there is a school room up there! That’s not random at all! Oh and there’s a ballet barre, that’s not weird! Boxes of books? Check! Tons of decades old and not expired medical equipment, done! I should note here that I always thought that the attic never sounded so bad, but then again, I’m a homebody by nature. They decorate the attic with paper flowers – hence the name of the book, and Cathy teaches the twins to read and write. They put an old mattress on the roof so they can tan and the twins can get the sunshine they need, and – oh yeah – so Chris and Cathy could totally get it on.

What? The brother and sister? Yes, gentle readers. See, the years pass and Cathy and Chris were teenagers (I don’t think that word ONE is given to how she deals with her womanly curse, but I may be mistaken). Anyway, they begin to develop sexual feelings towards one another. Well, mainly Chris does for Cathy, but she confesses that she would watch him change and even at one point measure his unit. Nice. Chris just loves, loves, loves Cathy but she keeps saying that they must really be the devil’s spawn if they feel this way. That’s right, Cathy, you are!! Long story short, one night he rapes her on the mattress they kept on the roof for sun. It’s not really rape, she is just very conflicted about whether this is what she wants or not.

Shortly thereafter, the mother successfully kills one of Cathy’s younger siblings: a twin named Cory. This makes Carrie (his aforementioned twin sister) go a bit crazy and self destructive. This is the final straw for the threesome who begins to sneak out to steal items they can later pawn. I’ve never understood why they let it go this far.

I lived in a suburb of New Jersey and it felt so much like a deathtrap that I started sneaking out before I knew what to do once I did it. Cathy was literally in a deathtrap and it took her FOUR YEARS before she was like, “You know, we need to bust out.”The book ends with just that. Christopher, Cathy, and Carrie do indeed leave the house, catch a bus and decide to travel to Florida with the money and items they have taken with them. Cory is long dead and buried who knows where, Carrie is all emo and for good reason, Cathy is walking differently thanks to her brother’s “rigid male sex,” and Chris is sporting a Lancelot haircut.

*SIGH* Have I mentioned how much I freakin’ love this book?

There's A Lot Of SMASH Going Around Today...

Are you fucking kidding me with this? SERIOUSLY? This actually had me so angry that I was almost in tears reading that article. TEARS OF RAGE. If you didn't click on the article, the United States refused to sign a U.N. declaration asking to decriminalize homosexuality. REFUSED TO SIGN IT. The motion was to DECRIMINALIZE it, not make it communicable. UGH. And of course, we're the only western nation that didn't sign it. I am very sorry, Rest of the World. I'm sorry we're such assholes. Most of us are hoping that things will improve in about 32 days and that our dickishness will decrease at least 67%. I live in hope...

Hey kids! Want a racist or anti-Semitic birthday cake? Go to Walmart! I'm so proud to be from New Jersey AND a Shop Rite shopper. Heheheh. I have to give Mame credit for linking me to that one. She was on that shit before everyone else went crazy over it. Also, read the comments on just about ANY article on the subject and have fun watching people misunderstand the First Amendment. Apparently, birthday cake is a Constitutionally-protected right! In that case, I DEMAND vanilla cake, buttercream icing and edible glitter! And I want it decorated with a picture of Gerard Way's face. And those sparkler candles.

I'M STILL WAITING FOR MY CAKE.

Overheard In Rite Aid (Sadly, Not New York)

So, I'm standing in line to purchase various drug store item (Ask anyone about my terrible drug [store] addiction) and overhear a male manager is telling a female cashier some scandalous story about another employee. The woman waiting on me is practically hopping with the urge to finish my transaction and go hear this tale of woe or incompetence. She scampers over and the manager laughs and says, "Yup, there's three methods of communication: telephone, telefax and tele-woman." The two women with him actually laugh and he chuckles doofily. I shoot him a death glare and mutter "asshole" under my breath as I stomp out of the store.

Seriously? I think that comment was last made in like, 1965. I may have heard it on Mad Men. No, wait. Mad Men is never that stupid. But ugh. And what makes this so hilarious, the GUY was the one who was gossiping! Oh, I'm sure to him, he was just "disseminating important information to my subordinates." No, dude. You were gossiping about about an absent coworker. Live with it. Assface.

Vote, Babies!

[Note: this is not a directive to actual babies. They can't vote. They are not old enough.]

So, the election is tomorrow. I'M SO NERVOUS, YOU GUYS. I mean, I'm glad it's here, because for fuck's sake, it feels like this election has been going on for about five years. Seriously. It's been FOREVER. And man, has it just been bringing out rather...unattractive sides in a lot of people.

I think it's obvious from my usual content around here that I really want Barack Obama to win. I really, really do. PLEASE. BRING US A CHANGE OF LEADERSHIP. PLEASE.

Please, everyone, vote. Stand in the lines. Make your voice heard. Please don't just assume that since your state historically goes a certain way that it will again and that your vote is not needed. IT IS. I'm pretty sure I'm preaching to the choir here, but in case I'm not...VOTE YOUR ASSES OFF. Plus, I think Starbucks is giving away free coffee if you vote. Hey, whatever gets people to the polls, right?

My one caveat is this: If you're not going to vote for Obama SOLELY because you don't want to vote for a black guy? Stay the fuck home. No one wants to hear your voice. Asshole.

Finally, a quote from The West Wing that entertains me endlessly:

"Because I'm tired of working for candidates who make me think that I should be embarrassed to believe what I believe, Sam! I'm tired of getting them elected! We all need some therapy, because somebody came along and said, 'Liberal means soft on crime, soft on drugs, soft on Communism, soft on defense, and we're gonna tax you back to the Stone Age because people shouldn't have to go to work if they don't want to!' And instead of saying, 'Well, excuse me, you right-wing, reactionary, xenophobic, homophobic, anti-education, anti-choice, pro-gun, Leave It To Beaver trip back to the Fifties...!', we cowered in the corner, and said, 'Please. Don't. Hurt. Me.' No more. I really don't care who's right, who's wrong. We're both right. We're both wrong. Let's have two parties, huh? What do you say?" -Bruno Gianelli, Gone Quiet

In fact, if you're so inclined, leave me your favorite The West Wing or various election-related quote in the comments. Happy Election Day, everyone!

It's HALLOWEEN! Where Are My Scary Movies?!

CABLE CHANNELS! I have a bone to pick with you! It's a holiday weekend and I scanned the channels and there are almost NO horror movies on! WHAT THE HELL!? And the ones that ARE on are shitty! And not the fun level of shitty that makes them entertaining, like The Covenant or any movie made for the Sci Fi channel. Like the crappy kind that are no fun to watch like, Final Destination 2 or the Saw movies. Ugh. Isn't this the time of year where AMC runs all the Halloween movies on a loop? Where are my Nightmare on Elm St.s? I DEMAND ARMY OF DARKNESS. SILVER BULLET! Come on, that's movie's awesome, the werewolf looks like a bear! Also, Gary Busey as his blowsiest.

But, on the scary plus side, I do get the Chiller channel. If you think they run quality horror movies, well, you'd be wrong. They don't run many good horror movies. For instance, this weekend, they are playing the miniseries remake of The Shining. I'm WATCHING it because nothing else is cooking, but it's not GOOD. That kid who plays Danny is a total mouth breather. But, the Chiller channel DOES play awesome horror television shows, like Profit and Kindred: The Embraced. I just watched Twin Peaks (It was the season one finale, ending with the mill fire and Agent Cooper getting shot. God, that show was great.) and the single most terrifying episode of a tv show ever, the second season finale of Millienium, "The Time Is Now." I watched that when it aired originally and it messed me up for DAYS. Anyone remember that show? It starred Lance Henriksen, registering about a Willem Dafoe on the Crag-O-Meter, playing Frank Black, a (sort of) psychic consultant for the police and a freaky fringe group. I loved that show. Heh, too bad no one else did!

I...Um...Really?

Sarah Palin says, "There's a place in hell reserved for women who don't support other women."

...

SERIOUSLY?

IRONIC, I THINK. I MEAN, DOES SHE REALLY NOT GET THAT?!?!?! She doesn't support a woman's right to choose EVEN IN THE CASE OF RAPE OR INCEST. There's the whole charging for a sexual assault exam. SHE WILLINGLY STANDS NEXT TO JOHN MCCAIN, A MAN WHO CALLS HIS WIFE A "CUNT" IN PUBLIC. A MAN WHO DOESN'T THINK BIRTH CONTROL SHOULD BE COVERED BY INSURANCE COMPANIES. A MAN WHO HAS DEMONSTRATED NUMEROUS TIMES THAT HE THINKS WOMEN ARE AND SHOULD BE TREATED AS, SECOND CLASS CITIZENS.

I'm seriously starting to think that we are all being Punk'd. Wouldn't that be comforting and make more sense?