Countdown to (Potential!) AWESOMENESS!

Putting aside my prickliness and various complaints about jerks on the internets: LESS THAN ONE HOUR UNTIL GAME OF THRONES!!!!!

Sorsha and my Gentleman Caller are coming over to flail with me! Well. More likely, Sorsha and I will flail with glee while GC and my mom roll their eyes.

It's gonna be GREAT.

Do you have Game of Thrones plans?

An Open Letter To Certain Male Geeks

Greetings, geeks! My name is Bea. I'm (as of last week-ish) 32 years old. I'm a college graduate. I work in social services. I bake. I knit. I read (a lot). I vote Democrat. I occasionally sparkle. I enjoy the works of Jane Austen, thunderstorms, the Oxford comma, and the laughter of children.

Oh, I'm also a geek. I've been a geek since I was a tiny little girl and I had a Dune coloring book. This Dune coloring book, actually. I also had a glow-in-the-dark He-Man sword when I was itty-bitty that I had to take in the bathroom to watch glow because I was never awake when it was dark outside. Because I was four. Later, I was a huge She-Ra fan and literally subscribed to her newsletter. I loved Star Wars, Blade Runner, The Terminator, Wonder Woman, The Incredible Hulk, The V miniseries (both of them!), Legend, The Dark Crystal, The NeverEnding Story, Dune (the Lynch version, NEVER the Sci-Fi version, though that was much later), Labyrinth, and Conan the Barbarian. The 80s were fun, weren't they?

I was a gamer girl in the late 80s and early 90s. Look. You think it's tough being a gamer girl now? (It is, I'm sure.) Try it then. I was LITERALLY the only girl I knew who played video games. Ever. I don't play anymore but I can still fuck you up at Super Mario Bros. 1-3. My parents took me and my brother to a Nintendo Convention in Valley Forge, PA as a birthday gift. I'm guessing it was 1990 or 1991. Whatever year Super Mario Bros. 3 came out. I remember because I smoked some dude at a demo of the game. He clearly wasn't expecting that from a little girl. It was AWESOME.

I've watched The X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, Doctor Who, Space: Above and Beyond, VR-5, Harsh Realm, Dead at 21, Love and Curses, Forever Knight, Beauty and the Beast, Dark Shadows (the old 60s soap AND the early 90s remake), Mystery Science Theater 3000, Twin Peaks, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Farscape, The Twilight Zone, The Outer Limits, Heroes, Roar, Dark Angel, Supernatural, Fringe, Roswell, Alias, Earth 2, Dark Skies, Millennium, Kindred: The Embraced, and SeaQuest DSV.

I've read Heinlein and Herbert. I've read all the Lord of the Rings books. I own the extended editions of all the movies AND the Trivial Pursuit game.

Sorsha and I have a zombie apocalypse plan and seriously. It's awesome. It's getting better by the day.

I read comic books. I go to cons. Got my picture taken with Michael Berryman. I saw The Dark Knight in the theater four times. I have the Iron Man Mr. Potato Head, Tony Starch sitting on top of my television. I have a Matchbox-sized replica of the Metallicar on my desk. My mousepad features a kingly Aragorn. I'm currently knitting a Gryffindor scarf.

As you can see from the above exhaustive list, I will watch/read/consume ANYTHING sci-fi/horror/fantasy-related. Regardless of quality as you can also see from the above list. Heh. I can authoritatively nerd out on a variety of subjects. And I do. Often. And I do all of these things despite the INCREDIBLE HANDICAP OF A PAIR OF BREASTS. SHOCKING, RIGHT?!

But seriously, you guys. (And not ALL geek guys, of course.) Can you please stop acting like you own the field of geekery all on your own? Aren't we past this? Seriously? Are we really still OMG STUNNED when a woman enjoys nerdy pursuits? I don't do these things because my boyfriend reads comics and I want him to like me.

For example, I listen to The Nerdist podcast every week. Twice a week if it's on twice. I love it. It's awesome. It's my favorite podcast. I love Chris Hardwick. He's hilarious. But Chris. Dude. I AM NOT THE ONLY WOMAN WHO LISTENS TO YOUR SHOW. THERE ARE FEMALE GEEKS. IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN, YOU'RE DATING ONE. So why do you keep making comments about how no women listen to your show or how your nerdiness is losing you female viewers. Um. We do and it's not. KNOCK IT OFF. My ovaries do not "dry up" when James Gunn and Jonah Ray get into a nerd fight over whether or not 28 Days Later qualifies as a zombie film. That was AWESOME. (My opinion: it does count as a zombie movie.)

I was listening today to a review of the Game of Thrones miniseries. (3 days, you guys!!!!) And the reviewer made a comment about it possibly being a turn-off for women because it's all male-dominated, bloody and full of ultra-violence. Riiiiiiiiiiiight. Because Dany and Arya and Catelyn and Sansa are just standing around, looking pretty. (Well, ok, Sansa is.) Because women can't stand watching male characters. (If we felt that way, we wouldn't watch anything, ever.) Because women don't like to watch dudes with swords fuck shit up. Especially because women don't enjoy a complex, well-told story. Mmm-hmmm.

Oh for Christ's sake, Terrance Zdunich: YES. GIRLS DO READ COMIC BOOKS. I even bought your creepy comic book about cockroaches.

I guess I'm mostly just tired of being told I don't exist.

ETA: This. Thanks, Sorsha. WHATEVER.

YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

So, I'm sitting at my desk this morning, sipping my coffee, listening to NPR, and organizing the day's events and I get a text from my most amiable geeky companion Sorsha: "JULY 12TH RELEASE FOR A DANCE WITH DRAGONS!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" And then there were more texts and later, when I got home, tweets from Dan Mac and others and the entire internet was like, wall-to-wall GEORGE R. R. MARTIN. It was AWESOME.

I'm so excited! I did this and then this and then this is what my office looked like all day today. (Instead of Doctor Who geeks, picture me doing a happy dance and a lot of confused social service workers. Good times.) And I know, I don't deserve to be excited. I only just read A Game of Thrones and am only halfway through A Clash of Kings. I haven't SUFFERED like the rest of you. I am aware of my privilege, ok? But my wait for the last two books will be just as long as yours now. WE WILL PINE TOGETHER.

OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS. I just went looking for the new trailer for the miniseries that went live during the Academy Awards and found a NEW NEW TRAILER! Holy shit, you guys! It's like today is GEEK CHRISTMAS. The Wall! A glimpse of the Others! MORE JAIME. Um. Soooo...Robb? Kind of hot, yeah?

I can't waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait!!!

Television Review: "Fringe," Season One

I've been sick all week. Missed three days of work because my doctor put me out due to "an upper respiratory infection and possible strep." WebMD said that I may have anthrax. AWESOME, RIGHT? Anyway, I felt like doody and had a lot of time on my hands.

Luckily, my boss Snowflower had just lent me her season one DVD of Fringe. I'd tried watching Fringe when the pilot originally aired and I didn't care for it and I haaaated the second episode so much that I gave up and never watched it again. (The second episode featured icky violence against women and notably, one of the few things I full-stop cannot watch: violence against a pregnant woman. Out like shout.) Also, I kept thinking, "You know, I saw this show the FIRST time, when they called it The X-Files" and that show broke my heart. In short, Fringe just didn't "take." But I am notoriously finicky about television shows. Catch me in the wrong mood and try to show me The Wire and I might tell it to piss off. Catch me in the RIGHT mood and I'll love the show and probably yell at you for not telling me about it sooner.

It's very difficult being me, ok?

ANYWAY. All my favorite geeks watch this show and I don't really HAVE a favorite show right now. At least, not until A Game of Thrones airs. THEN IT'S ON, BABIES.

**Possible spoilers through the beginning of season 2 of Fringe**

So, for three days, I sat/laid in bed watching the entire first season, only getting up to make more tea and change DVDs. (Makers of the Fringe DVD sets: put more episodes per disc. Two episodes per disc is BULLSHIT.) I still didn't like the pilot all that much and I liberally fast-forwarded through the bits of episode two I didn't like. I'm perusing through the episode guide trying to see the episode that really GOT me. Because I liked it enough to keep watching (Though, really, I had nothing better to do) but wasn't really WILD about. I liked the characters, particularly Walter and Astrid but, you know. Whatever. And it was episodes ten and eleven, "Safe" and "Bound." The one where the guy gets stuck through a wall while trying to rob a bank and the one where Olivia is kidnapped by mad scientists and IS TOTALLY AWESOME AND KICKS FUCKING ASS. Ahem. Excuse me.

So, yeah. That took awhile. But the second half of the season is WAY better than the first. Once they get started on their whole mytharc and the characters really take shape, it ROCKS. And all the actors are great. John Noble (I remember him mostly as the drive-mad-by-Sauron King Denethor from The Return of the King) is SO awesome as Walter, a loopy yet brilliant scientist loosed from a mental institution to help the FBI. I love Walter very, very much. Jonathan Jackson is surprisingly good as Peter Bishop, Walter's underachieving genius rascal son. I, sadly, remember him from Dawson's Creek. Don't look at me like that. I was in college in the late 90s. We all watched that shit. He's much better here, I promise. And Astrid! Astrid is so great and sometimes I think she deserves better coworkers (They're always abandoning her and leaving her to Walter-sit!), but then I wouldn't have the delight of her many WTF faces. And I love those.

Olivia Dunham, you guys. I wasn't sure about her at first, but I LOVE HER. She is so badass. Tough and smart and warm and just AWESOME. There's a storyline where this asshole from Homeland Security who Olivia had previously put away for rape is trying to shut down the Fringe Division (They did a great job casting this character. I hated his face INSTANTLY). And he's trying to be all looming and intimidating and she's just looking at him like, "Whatev." And then I said aloud, "Dude. You will NEVER break her." And then I realized I must be in love with her. Heh. Plus, she has REALLY great hair. No, really. Look how pretty.

And Lance Reddick! From The Wire! LOVE that guy! Daniels was one of my favorites on that show! (And Kima and Lester!) I was dubious about Broyles at first because he's kind of a jerk, but he turns that around. He has such a great voice. He should narrate things. Also? He should take his shirt off more often. I know, I know, he's a serious actor. He's excellent. But Lance also has a smokin' hot body under those trench coats. I know this from The Wire, OK. So my integrity is in place. (Sort of.) I tried to find you a picture, Dear Readers, but alas. I turned up shirtless pictures of Gerard Butler and that politician who just resigned for taking camera phone pictures of himself.

I like Kirk Acevedo and I liked him as Charlie but I thought his character was sort of superfluous, so I wasn't surprised that he was killed off. Though the manner in which he was offed surprised me. I thought it would be a whole huge drama with him dying in Olivia's arms or something, not secretly killed and incinerated by a shape-shifter. I was sorry to see him go, but that was pretty awesome.

And I loooooove Nina Sharp. I don't trust her at ALL, but I find her delightfully cagey and I love her robot arm. And I'm obsessed with finding The Observer in every episode. This website was helpful in enabling me. I really like Michael Cerveris; I saw him a few years ago in Sweeney Todd and he was GREAT. I'm always weirdly proprietary with actors I've seen in plays. Heh.

I DON'T like the storyline with Olivia's sister and niece. BORING. Also, it never works out well for the heroine's sister, ok? Just ask Melissa Scully, Nadia Santos, Maddy Ferguson (Ok, she was a cousin. An IDENTICAL cousin, though), and Beth March. Just, no. I like the actress who plays Rachel, Ari Graynor. She's hilarious in general, though toned down on Fringe. I adore her in Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist. (P.S. If you ever wanted to know what I was like in high school and college - and of course you do! - watch this movie. I was totally Norah. Mame pointed this out to me and made me watch it and wow.)

The finale! OMG! Leonard Nimoy! Alternate worlds! David Robert Jones! Craziness!

So, you know, Fringe. Good stuff! Instead of being an X-Files rip-off, it's more like a cross between Alias and The X-Files, with most of the good things of both and less of the bad. I've been supplied with season two and I've started DVRing season three so I can catch up.

Prepping For The Oscars!

My mom, brother and I have been trying to watch as many Oscar-nominated movies as possible before the ceremony. I think I've mentioned before in this space that I LOVE the Academy Awards. Yes, they're stupid and lame and the right people never win. (I'm still lookin' at YOU, Julia Roberts.) But still. We have a party every year with snacks and voting and we start with bitchy, red carpet dress mocking. I have SUCH high hopes for Helena Bonham Carter's dress. Maybe it will rival Bjork's crazy swan thing! ::fingers crossed::

Here's the scorecard so far (List stolen from Sars at Tomato Nation):

• 127 Hours (There's no fucking way I'm going to see this movie.)
• Alice in Wonderland (It was fine. I mostly went for the Michael Sheen.)
• Animal Kingdom (I would LOVE to see this. I'll probably try to grab it from the Redbox this weekend.)
• Another Year
• Barney's Version
• Biutiful
  
• Black Swan (I really loved this movie until the last 20 minutes where I feel like it went off the rails a bit. Well. A lot. Natalie Portman was really great. The scene where she calls her mother from the bathroom stall brought tears to my eyes AND a chill up my spine.)
• Blue Valentine (Haven't gotten around to this one yet. I'm not sure I'll be able to before the ceremony. It's...probably not a date movie, right?)
  
• The Confession
• Country Strong (Yeah, no.)
  
• The Crush
• Day & Night
• Dogtooth (I'm really morbidly curious about this one.)
• Exit Through the Gift Shop
• The Fighter (Meh. I hate boxing.)
  
• Gasland
• God of Love
• The Gruffalo
• Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, pt. 1 (Of course I saw this one. Loved it. I'm sure it won't win anything. Heh.)
• Hereafter (I'm curious about this movie. I like things to with with the afterlife, etc. but it's hard to do well.)
  
• How to Train Your Dragon (I think the next time we keep my nephew overnight, we'll rent this.)
  
• I Am Love
• The Illusionist
• In A Better World
• Incendies
• Inception (LOVED this movie. My second favorite of 2010. My Gentleman Caller and I watched it with the Rifftrax commentary and it was HILARIOUS.)
• Inside Job
• Iron Man 2 (Mmm...Downey...)
  
• The Kids Are All Right (I liked this movie quite a bit. The dialogue was great; it felt very natural and more like how real people talk. They really seemed like a family.)
• Killing In The Name
• The King's Speech (LovedlovedLOVED it. Much funnier than I expected. Lovely and touching and everyone in it is great.)
  
• Let's Pollute
• The Lost Thing
• Madagascar, A Journey Diary
• Na Wewe
• Outside The Law
• Poster Girl
• Rabbit Hole (I saw the play during its original Broadway run and adored it. I'd like to see the movie. I'm not notably a Nicole Kidman fan, but she can be excellent when she puts her mind to it. And when her forehead moves.)
  
• Restrepo (Documentaries aren't usually my thing, but I'd like to see this.)
  
• Salt (...No.)
  
• The Social Network (I liked this fine, but wasn't as impressed with it as many seemed to be. Andrew Garfield is ADORABLE. I disagreed with the last line. Mark Zuckerberg, as portrayed in this film, is a giant asshole. Don't try to tell me differently, Rashida Jones.)
  
• Strangers No More
  
• Sun Come Up
  
• Tangled (I will SO see this. Someday.)
  
• The Tempest (Helen Mirren is hot.)
  
• The Town (It was fine. Whatever. Jeremy Renner was great. I really liked Rebecca Hall. Blake Lively was woefully miscast and WAY too young for the role. PEOPLE WHO MAKE MOVIES. STOP DOING THAT. Don't try to tell me that Blake Lively and Ben Affleck could have had a years-long relationship in any way other than statutory rape. Ugh.)
  
• Toy Story 3 (Sobbed off and on for the whole movie. It's wonderful.)
  
• Tron: Legacy (My Gentleman Caller dragged me to this one. Well. I went willingly because of Michael Sheen [Seeing a pattern here?] and the Daft Punk score. It was fine. I despised Garrett Hedlund in the main role, but Jeff Bridges and Olivia Wilde were fine. Sheen was hilarious and, I'm sure, took home massive amounts of money for his 15 minutes of screentime.)
  
• True Grit (GAH. I HAVE to see this before the Oscars!)
  
• Unstoppable (I do not have to see this one, ever.)
  
• The Warriors of Quigang
• Waste Land
• The Way Back
• Winter's Bone (I adored this film. Best movie of the year, hands down. Everyone in it is wonderful and perfect, but John Hawkes and Jennifer Lawrence are SO excellent. I can't say enough good things about this film.)
  
• Wish 143
• Wolfman (I would watch this with friends to mock it. We should get on that.)

Looks like I've got some work to do! What Oscar movies have you seen?

Rants of Ice and Fire: Oh, HELL No

Hey Sorsha, remember when I recommended that podcast to you, Podcast of Ice and Fire? Yeah, well, I'm rescinding my recommendation. I enjoyed the first episode and part of the second one I listened to (I texted you a quote) but immediately after that, one of the women on the 'cast treated the listeners to a lecture about Catelyn Stark and how she's not a strong character because she's a wife and mother.

...No, really. That was it. I'm on record as not being a huge Catelyn fan. Mostly because I find her boring and think she was a bitch to Jon Snow, whom I adore. (Though I can sort of understand her reasoning. Well. As much as I can understand why anyone would be mean to a little kid, even if he IS your husband's illegitimate kid of TOP SECRET maternity.) But I certainly don't think she's weak. And I think she left "traditional" femininity behind when she hopped on her horse to go rally the Tullys and gather evidence against the Lannisters for booting her son out the window. And then arresting Tyrion. And the way she handled the arrest was pretty fucking masterful. And she seems extra tough when you compare her to her miserable sister. Ugh.

Yeah, she raised five kids. Hell, six, if you count Jon Snow. (Are we to think she completely ignored him? I'm unclear on this. I guess it doesn't matter much.) She was a dutiful and loving wife to Ned and mistress of Winterfell. None of these things make her weak. Motherhood's a fucking tough job, I'm pretty sure. Especially when you don't have things like, you know, epidurals, antibiotics, diapers, pacifiers and soap. And unlike that gorgon Cersei (To whom she was being compared unfavorably), she doesn't: 1. Fuck her brother 2. Murder her husband 3. Have any Damien-Omen kids.

I'm mostly just really offended by the notion that if you don't try to act like a man, you're weak. Like I said in my ridiculously impassioned defense of Sansa: not everyone can be Arya or Dany. If you put a sword in my hand, I'd probably be all, "Um. This is heavy. I'm just gonna put this down over here before I drop it on my foot" and then I'd go read a book. Or knit something. Or bake something. In fact, I'm looking up brownie recipes as we speak. ...Type. And I'd (GASP!) like to get married and have babies someday. !!!!!!!!! Whatever. I GUESS I'M JUST TOO WEAK/BORING/USELESS TO LIVE.

So, back to the podcast...I'll be unsubscribing. Which sucks because I loved being able to listen to something Westeros-related at work. It's the NEXT BEST THING to reading the novels. But I don't need that kind of misogynistic bullshit.

AND NO BROWNIES FOR YOU, PODCAST OF ICE AND FIRE.

ETA: Oh, there was other stuff, too. This was just the bit I was ranty about.

Well, There Goes the Rest of My Spare Time For the Forseeable Future...

I visited my local used book store yesterday to see if they had book two of A Song of Ice and Fire in stock and guess what?! They had all three! The bookseller was quite delighted with my purchases; he seemed to be a big fan of the series. He warned me ominously that it's been years since the last book came out and that No One Knows when book five will be out. I assured him that I was aware of the risk and was willing to fling myself headlong into book-related heartbreak.* The best part is that they only cost me $10! YAAAY! (All three at Amazon was going to set me back $30, which had me squawking in indignation, but I was still totally going to pay it.)

Also, Sorcha and I may need to have a mild throwdown over Sansa Stark. Only mild because I can see her point of view, but I have all this empathy for Sansa.

*Hey, it was, like, twelve years between the releases of the fourth and fifth Earth's Children novels. Wait. Bad example. Book Five of that series, Shelters of Stone, suuuuuucked. Like, a lot.

Mini Review of Book-In-Progress: "A Game of Thrones"

Sorsha has been after me for months in her gentle way (No, really. She doesn't pressure. She knows better. Almost no one manipulates me better than her) to start reading the first book in A Song of Ice and Fire series, A Game of Thrones.

I've had the damn book for over a year. I bought it at a used book store when she first started talking about it and I'd heard about the series from my fellow geeks online. Mostly, they were bitching about the next book not being out. And then Neil Gaiman told them to shut up about it and that was fun. So, I picked up the book, took one look at all the characters with the crazy names and put it back down. I'd look at it longingly on occasion, but went on to other things. But I really wanted to get it read before the HBO miniseries with the AWESOME cast came on. In April. I think I've got time. But you know. Time gets away from you. And then there was this preview.

Yeah. I need to get on that.

So, I started it this week. DETERMINED.

After numerous texts to Sorsha (And pouncing on her at work), visits to the IMDB page (Sometimes it helps if I can get mental pictures of the characters in my mind) and the Wikipedia page (Careful there if you're spoiler-averse) and I've mostly got my brain wrapped around the thirty or so primary and secondary characters and the "rules" of the world they live in.

And it's so fucking awesome. It's like a really mean, dirty (Both in sexual terms and like, grime) Middle Earth. Everyone is complex and layered and morally ambiguous. My favorite character is still Daenerys, nicknamed Dany, a thirteen-year-old deposed princess married off by her asshole brother to a warlord so he (The asshole brother) can build his army and get his throne back. She's terrified (And who wouldn't be?) but eventually comes to like her scary husband (Jason Momoa is playing him in the mini, if that tells you anything) and, more importantly, realizes that she needs to toughen the fuck up if she's going to survive. And she DOES and it's AWESOME. Also, that picture of her from IMDB immediately made me think of the Jungle Queen from The Maxx. 90s nostalgia!

So, reading continues and I need to order the next three books off of Amazon. WOOOO!!!

P.S. Three guesses as to why I used the Flowers in the Attic tag. Hee.

Christmas, Christmas Time Is Here!

Ah, a December Saturday evening...I'm tucked up in my warmest jimjams with a cup of tea and an English muffin preparing to do one of my favorite lame seasonal activities: watching Christmas episodes of television shows on DVD. And if you think I'm SUPER lame for doing this...well. Sustained, I guess. But I AM super lame and this blog generally documents my lamitudes and you find that delightful, DON'T YOU? Ahem.

ANYWAY.

I'm starting with My So-Called Life,"So-Called Angels." I'm about 30 seconds in and oh, Ricky. I started here because I've been listening to the Extra Hot Great podcast (And if you're not, you should be. And the Pop Culture Happy Hour. Seriously. They both bring me much glee at work. And really, who couldn't use more glee at work? You could. I know you could) and they were talking about MSCL and it made me remember how much I love that show. (Also, 10 minutes in and I remember how much I loathe Angela's sister Danielle. Shut UP, Danielle, GOD.)

So here's what I've got on deck (Literally, I have a pile of DVDs sitting next to me):

• Gilmore Girls, "Forgiveness and Stuff," season 1, episode 10. Everyone is still mad at everyone after Rory and Dean stayed out all night after her first dance. The Richard goes to the hospital with chest pains and they get over it. Oh, season one Gilmore Girls. How much you did not suck! Remember when I you didn't want to slap Rory?
  
• Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Amends," season 3, episode 10. The one where The First Evil makes its, um, first appearance and tries to corrupt Angel. And Willow tries to seduce Oz in an adorable fashion. I know most people don't like this episode but it's full of angst delicious angst and I love it.
  
• Joan of Arcadia, "The Uncertainty Principle," season 1 episode 11. This one fudging a little because it's not a terribly Christmasy episode but it revolves around the winter dance. God tells Joan to go to the dance with a troubled boy (Who played Andrew Schillinger on Oz and it weirded me out to see him here) and things get all dramatic. I always get the chills during the last five minutes of this episode.
  
• Veronica Mars, "An Echolls Family Christmas," season 1, episode 10. Veronica is hired to find out who stole the winnings from a 09er poker game and Keith investigates a famous actor's stalking. There's a shanking. It's pretty awesome.
  
• Doctor Who, "The Christmas Invasion," series 2, episode 1. God, I love this episode. David Tennant's first episode as the Tenth Doctor and he totally kicks ass. I got annoyed with Ten toward the end (SHUT UP WITH YOUR EMO MAN PAIN, FOR REAL!) but I adored him when he first started.
  
• The West Wing, "In Excelsis Deo," season 1, episode 20 and "Noel," season 2, episode 10. The first is when a homeless veteran dies wearing a coat that Toby donated to Goodwill and Toby arranges a military funeral for him. The second is the one where Josh has PTSD and is my second favorite episode of TWW EVER (My first favorite, like everyone else ever, is "Two Cathedrals").
  
• The Office, "Christmas Party, season 2, episode 16. Yaaaankee swap and Jim gets Pam a teapot. (I also hate Michael Scott.)
  
• Scrubs, "My Own Personal Jesus," season 1, episode 11. The gang deliver a baby in a park. Dr. Cox is grinchy.
  

So...what's YOUR favorite Christmas episode? Something I didn't mention? Do you hate Danielle Chase as much as I do?

ALSO.

I need to talk about Sherlock. DON'T THINK I WON'T. But I'm tired right now. But it is SO. AWESOME. If you haven't watched it, you need to. If you have, tell me in the comments how it is your favorite thing ever.

I'll write a full review soon. VERY. SOON.

But for you ladies (and gents!), a round of Marry, Cliff, Shag from Sherlock!

Marry, Cliff, Shag: Sherlock, John, Lestrade. GO!

A Conversation With the Guy at Target Concerning My Chemical Romance

Today was the release date for the new My Chemical Romance CD, Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys. Of course I went out on my lunch break and bought it. And very happily danced my way back to work. Yes, I can dance and drive at the same time. I'm special that way. VERY. SPECIAL.

Now, if you clicked that Target link -- and I doubt you did -- you'll see that it says that the CD is available online but not in stores. Since today was the release date, this confused me. And I'd be damned if I'd waste precious minutes of my lunch break on a failed visit to Target. So, I called the store.

I knew I would regret this.

The Target near my work is not a good Target. It's poorly stocked and staffed. I routinely want to slap people in the makeup aisles. But, whatever, it's two seconds away from my work; it's convenient. So, this happened:

Target Guy: Hellothankyouforcallingtargetthisiselectronicshowmayihelpyou.

Me: Hi! Do you have My Chemical Romance's new CD in stock today?

Target Guy: ...What is it called?

Me: Danger Days.

Target Guy: [dubiously] What's the name of the band?

Me: [sigh] My Chemical Romance.

Target Guy: [suspiciously] And what's the name of the CD again?

Me: Danger. Days.

Target Guys: Danger Days...Danger Days...huh. And what genre of music is that?

Me: Rock.

Target Guy: ...Huh. Yeah, we have it. It's $8.99.

Me: Cool! Thanks!

fin.

I enjoyed how he clearly had no idea what I was talking about and thought I was just making shit up. Which is not outside the realm of possibility, but not today. Whatever, he probably just has better taste in music than I do. WHATEVER, DON'T JUDGE ME.

IT'S REALLY AWESOME! :DDDDDDDDD

"Iron Man" vs. "The Dark Knight" or Bea Is An Embarrassingly Huge Geek, Feel Free To Mock Her

I was listening to the Culturetopia podcast at work today. Culturetopia's Pop Culture Happy Hour is one of my favorites, it's kind of hysterical. Anyway. One of the...podcasters? whatever was talking about comic book movies and said that they thought that Iron Man was as good, if not better than, The Dark Knight. Of course, I squawked in indignation. But, then I thought about it.

...Huh. Is Iron Man as good a movie as The Dark Knight? And why has this geek Thunderdome question never occurred to me before? I'm frankly disappointed in myself. Whatever. So, let's lay out the facts here...First, let me say that I am not a superhero comic book geek. I'm more a graphic novel kind of girl and I don't really read superhero comics at all. Except for the odd Batman book here and there. Secondly, I have a giant crush on Robert Downey Jr. right now and that could bias my answers just a taaad.

• Best Superhero: Hmm. I like Batman better. Iron Man is fine and all but basically, he's a dude in a suit. I mean, he's smart and good with, you know, physics and stuff, but he's a spoiled playboy in a big metal suit. Batman? TRAINED BY NINJAS. You can't beat that with an M.I.T. degree. No way.
  
• Best Alter Ego: Oh my God, Tony Stark all the way. SHUT UP, BRUCE WAYNE. NO, SHUT UP SOME MORE. GO GET SOME THERAPY. Tony Stark has daddy issues, but does he whinge about them all the time and fantasize about bats? No. No, he does not. I mean, sure, he sluts it up and drinks like a fish but he doesn't WHINE. And then he gets kidnapped and tortured and he turns his PTSD into something positive! So there. Sure, Bruce Wayne fakes the whole spoiled and slutty playboy thing, but Tony? Not faking. And he's hilaarious.
  
• Best Special Lady Friend: Pepper Potts is so much awesomer than anyone but she is particularly awesomer than Rachel Dawes, who kind of sucks. There is no character in the Marvel 'verse that is more important to me than Pepper Potts. (Seriously, if she's not in the Avengers movie, I'll cut someone. Not kidding. [Kidding. I'm a Quaker. No cutting.]) Pepper is smart, ladylike, competent but doesn't take any bullshit. Particularly from Tony. She'll reach into his chest and change his glowy-heart-thing (Yes, I know what it's called) and dismiss his one night stands in the morning for him, but she is not going to let him talk dirty at her or put up with any nonsense. Can you tell that I'm a HUGE Tony/Pepper fan? Heh. Ugh, Rachel Dawes. I went on at some length in my review of The Dark Knight concerning the problems I have with Ms. Dawes. Seriously, a girl doesn't have to have superpowers or be ass kickin' or a villain or hero to be awesome. She can just be...awesome. See also: Ross, Betty or if we're talkin' books, Everdeen, Katniss.
  
• Best Villains: The Dark Knight, no question. Can you get better villains that Heath Ledger's Joker and Aaron Eckhart's Two-Face? And I think Iron Man villains tend to be kind of weak. Obadiah Stane was pretty meh. I mean, he had a good scene with Gwyneth Paltrow when she's trying to get the files off of Tony's computer and he's subtly menacing her but whatever. One scene. Heath Ledger basically OWNED The Dark Knight.
  
• Best Sidekicks/Friends: This also goes to The Dark Knight. I think Lucius, Alfred and Gordon are much more awesome than Happy and Rhodey. Though Tony Stark has some cool robots.
• Lead Actors: I really love both Christian Bale and Robert Downey Jr. They're two of my favorite actors. I much prefer what Downey does with Tony Stark to what Bale does with Bruce Wayne/Batman. I find Downey more nuanced. I'm not entirely wild about Bale's gravelly Batman voice. The way Downey interacts with Gwyneth Paltrow's Pepper and how he quietly plays Tony's return after his kidnapping is really excellent. I can name a dozen little things that Downey does that makes his performance as Tony memorable but I can't name a single one that Bale does besides being looming and muscley.
  
• Miscellaneous: I prefer the look of The Dark Knight and the grim, goth vibe. I really like the music in The Dark Knight. Though I know a lot of people haaaaated it, I LOVED the use of the Black Sabbath song "Iron Man" over the end credits of that movie. I laaaaughed.

Man. Even after laying it out like that, I'm still not sure! I think I enjoy Iron Man more. It's definitely more fun. When I have a bad day, I'm going to come home and watch Iron Man. But I think The Dark Knight is a better film.

Oh, It's ON...

I think Sorsha and I are going to have an epic throwdown over the superior Sherlock Holmes portrayer: Jeremy Brett or Basil Rathbone. Watch this space for VICTORIAN THUNDERDOME. (I should have Six the Laptop back from my computer-fixer-guy next week!)

Chime in, Dear Readers...who's your favorite Holmes? You know I LOVE Robert Downey Jr. but he's my #2 Holmes. BRETT ALL THE WAY. HE IS THE DEFINITIVE HOLMES.

I can't speak to the quality of the new guy in the BBC series Sherlock (Because it doesn't air in the U.S. until FREAKIN' OCTOBER), but he does have the gay porniest name in all the land: Benedict Cumberbatch. Yeah.

My Recent Trip Down Robert Downey Jr. Lane

It should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me In Real Life or is a reader of this blog that I go through celebrity boyfriends like most people change their sheets. You know, a new one every week or so, a little longer if I get lazy. I mean, this summer alone, I've gone through like, four. Whatever, I like variety. Because what I do is, I find someone to obsess over and then I rent every one of their movies I can find and watch them all. And then when I've viewed all the media I can find concerning them, I get bored and move on. I mean, by the time I got sick of Christopher Eccleston, I'd watched his entire season of Doctor Who AND all the DVD extras and every one of his movies. Including Jude. Which made me suicidal. Goddamn, that movie is depressing.

Hey, a girl has to have a hobby, right? So, this summer the lucky new obsessee seems to be...Robert Downey Jr. I know, I know. That's almost...normal, right? He's like, traditionally handsome and an actual movie star! I know. I'm disappointed too. But whatever. At least he's got lots of movies to choose from, many of which I've already seen and liked. Here's what I've watched so far:

• Iron Man and Iron Man 2: Duh. Any self-respecting geek has already seen and loved these. They're really great adaptations and Downey is great in them. And I think I love Iron Man 2 even more because I have a SEVERE hate-on for Terrance Howard. I hated Hustle & Flow and I resent everyone who was involved with that shit-ass movie. HATE. So, the fact that he was replaced by Don Cheadle, whom I ADORE, just made it all the better. Love Gwyneth Paltrow as Pepper and I LOVE Pepper and Tony. They are so cute.
• Sherlock Holmes: Saw it when it came out, of course. Loved it then. Dragged EGT to see when she came to visit. Still loved it. I just watched it recently and aside from the actual DVD refusing to play on my PS2 (Fuck you, Warner Bros copy guard), I loved it even more upon rewatching. Downey is really great as Holmes, smart and bitchy and funny. One of the best things about Downey as an actor is that he's always thinking, always doing something interesting, even when not much is going on. I LOVE the scene at the end on the scaffolding with Holmes, Irene Adler (The lovely Rachel McAdam) and the bad guy, Blackwhatever. And Blackwhatever is about to push Irene off the edge and Downey does this subtle, begging headshake and bad guy shoves her off the edge and twirls his mustache and Downey shouts a clipped, "NO!" before he can stop himself. It's SO GREAT. And I love Jude Law as Watson. I am not notably a Law fan, but boy, was he fun in this movie.
• Chaplin: Ugh, sorry guys. I thought this was really boring. I don't usually like biopics because they usually suuuuuck. Downey was good in this and so was Kevin Kline (He's ALWAYS good) but ZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
• A Scanner Darkly: I have this from the library and am watching it now. Hee. This shit is crazy.
  

And the movie that prompted this post was Less Than Zero, which the lovely Sorsha loaned to me and also blogged about. She is such a shameless enabler. I didn't really like the movie. I'd heard it wasn't very good but that RDJ was fantastic in it. I mostly agree with this statement. My first problem: I don't usually like movies about drug addicts. Second problem? I don't give a shit about rich people and how miserable they all are. Seriously, go dry your tears on your money. (Class issues? Me? NO. SURELY NOT.) Third problem? I hate Andrew McCarthy. I didn't like him in Pretty in Pink. I didn't like him in Mannequin. I do not like him in a house, I do not like him with a mouse. He has a high voice. It weirds me out.

So, with all these strikes against it, I watched the damn movie. Ugh. Whatever. It was ok. I think McCarthy and Jami Gertz are both pretty bad in it. I liked Gertz fine in both Lost Boys and Solarbabies (WHAT? I LIKE THAT MOVIE. IT'S NOT A CRIME, OK?) [It sort of is] but I didn't think she was too great here. Probably they just both looked really bad next to really fabulous performances by Robert Downey Jr. and James Spader.

McCarthy plays Clay, who has just come home from college at Christmas to see his ex-girlfriend Blair (I think it's Blair. Maybe it's Blake. Whatever, I'm not looking it up, I just won't mention her name again. PROBLEM SOLVED) whom he'd dumped at Thanksgiving because he caught her and his best friend Julian boning. Whatever. I can't fault her taste. It's all very dramatic, with a bouquet of flowers being pegged at their post-coital heads. HA. Downey plays Julian, the wacky best friend who's become seriously addicted to drugs. Cocaine, I think. I don't know, something snorty. Like any addict, Julian is, by turns, charming, needy, aggressive, affectionate, nasty and desperate. Downey is really great at switching him back and forth. It's a really painful performance to watch especially when you know that later it mirrored real life. Sometimes Julian is so vulnerable you can barely stand to look at him (Something I also noticed with Downey's performance in Chaplin) and other times he's so cocky, you just want to bitch-slap him. The scene with Julian and his dad sort-of reconciling had me in tears. I texted Sorsha and she laughed at me. NICE, RIGHT?

James Spader, my favorite douchebag, plays Rip (No, I'm not kidding you with that name), the drug dealer who convinces Julian that the best way to work off his debt is as a rentboy. Spader is really nasty and sleazy and great in his manipulation of the increasingly stupid Julian. It's pretty masterful. God, I love James Spader. Heh. I'm sure the sight of Downey on his knees in a day-glo hotel room was pretty shocking for the 80s but I wasn't very impressed. And I could have done without all the puking, thanks. And memo to 80s Downey: It's called Chapstick. Get you some.

Also, Mame would like you all to know that she had a crush on Robert Downey Jr. in the late 90s when she made me watch Two Girls and a Guy. I bitched the entire time. TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE movie. But Mame was right. That guy is hot. (Um, I urge you all to head over to the IMDB entry for that movie. Look at the plot keywords. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)

ETA: DUDE. I forgot Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang, basically the BEST MOVIE EVER. Ugh, I fail at my own blog. It's a great movie, Downey is great in it and so is Val Kilmer. Yes, THAT Val Kilmer. He's awesome. And it's written by Shane Black, who writes great action movies. Go rent it.

Wherein the Reader Learns That the Narrator is Batshit Crazy or Disasters I've Obsessed Over and Related Media

So, I'm pretty neurotic, right? Given toward anxiety and borderline OCD-ish tendencies. Not quite diagnosable for either Generalized Anxiety Disorder or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (I looked it up in the DSM-IV. At work. Several times), but close. I'm a lot better than I used to be, actually. I spend fewer nights in a tangle of panic-ridden insomnia. I don't have actual panic attacks. Pong used to call me a "ninny" when we were dating and I'd spin off on some tangent about how the bus driver on my route would think I'd cheated him because he'd let me on the bus without paying because I'd told him I was going to buy a monthly bus pass but then the store was SOLD OUT of bus passes and it's not like I'd ASKED him to let me on the bus for free! He offered! I couldn't help it!

See? That's how I am. A ninny.

But you know what doesn't help my ninny-like nature? My attraction to media involving disasters and disastrous things. If it could conceivably send a tickle of pure horror down my spine, I'M THERE. I WANT TO READ ABOUT IT/WATCH THAT DOCUMENTARY, ETC. This is not good. This is not conducive to my mental health/serenity/zen whatever. IT GENERALLY REALLY DAMAGES MY CALM. But I am powerless to stop. I totally get this from my mother, who also loves hearing about a good disaster. The woman lulls herself to sleep with forensic shows, ok? But the thing is, she doesn't freak out! I DO. You know who is my co-pilot on this trip to Panicville, Population: 2? Sorsha. You know who constantly is trying to stop me from boarding the S.S. Freakout? Mame. And EGT.

Mame and I have been friends for like, 17 years? Something like that? Our friendship is a high school student, at any rate. She has always tried to stop me when my obsessions reach peak levels. She tries to grab books about disasters out of my hands. She tells me I'm not allowed to watch anymore documentaries about Mt. Everest. If EGT could, she would break into my house and install internet controls on my laptop. Not to keep me from reading porn, she's fine with that. No, to keep me from reading about school shootings. Or extinction level events (PRIONS! ASTEROIDS! CLIMATE CHANGE! KRAKENS!). Or watching British Cold War PSAs. (NO, SERIOUSLY. DON'T WATCH THOSE.) I don't listen to them, but I appreciate their efforts. It makes me feel loved.

Ah, but Sorsha. I met Sorsha at work and we had a lot in common right away. We both are snarky and excitable and have a wide streak of geekiness. You know how the first time you hang out with someone from work, it's a delicate dance, almost like a date? You know, you have to sort of feel them out for how weird you can reveal yourself to be? Or...is that just me? 'K, then. The first time Sorsha and I hung out, we talked for 6 hours about: Lord of the Rings, Buffy, Doctor Who and all kinds of other geeky things. Then somehow, we turned to...disasters. And how we both LOVE READING ABOUT THEM. I told her about crowd crushing. She told me about rogue waves. I told her about Mt. Everest and how it wants to kill you for climbing it. She told me about how the Canary Islands might fall into the ocean and cause a mega-tsunami. Then we talked about serial killers. It was SO much fun. Her poor sainted husband sat and listened for awhile, eyebrows raised. And then he said, and I quote, "Dear God, there's another one of you" and stomped off to do something useful. Sorsha's and my bonding over disasters makes me feel accepted.

Here is a by-no-means-complete list of some of the horrible things I've obsessed about and related media:

• Anthrax and smallpox: The Demon in the Freezer, Richard Preston (I also read The Hot Zone by the same author.)
  
• Rogue waves/mega-tsunamis (There is an alarming lack of media about this sort of thing!)
• Crowd crushing (ALSO an alarming lack! This is a public safety issue! If you really want to freak out, read about the Hillsborough Stadium Disaster. *shudder*)
• People who leave their kids in hot cars: hyperthermia
• Various man-made disasters
• The Boston Molasses Disaster (No, that's not an experimental 80s band.)
  
• The Dyatlov Pass Incident (This one FREAKS ME OUT! It's like an X-Files episode!)
• Too many true crime novels to count
  

Yeah. So...click on any of those links and never sleep again. I know this isn't good for me and it will make me anxious and sad. And yet. If I know you in real life, I'm sure I have accosted you at some point and detailed some terrifying incident in excited yet wary tones. And I'm sorry for that. But hey, you did learn that four people per square meter is minimum safe distance in a crowd, right? IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.

Music Review: Godspeed You! Black Emperor, "f#a# (infinity symbol)"

So. One of my favorite movies EVER is 28 Days Later. It scared the shit out of me in the theater, great storyline, great performances, Christopher Eccleston AND Cillian Murphy, an awesome heroine in Selena, post-apocalyptic zombies...I mean, really. That's like catnip for me. Anyway, for some reason, I've been really into the soundtrack lately. I own it and haven't listened to it in years, but dug it out the other day. But then I remembered that my favorite musical interlude from the film isn't on the official soundtrack and I didn't know why. And if there's thing I love to do, it's unraveling bullshit trivia like that.

My favorite bit is the music that plays over the scene where Jim is wandering around the deserted city. It's from the Canadian band Godspeed You! Black Emperor's album "f#a# (infinity symbol)" [Ed. Actual infinity symbol. I just don't know how to do that. And don't care that much.] from the second...movement, I guess you'd call it, "East Hastings." Huh. I had never, ever heard of that band. And of course, when I check on the dark mother iTunes, each track is "album only." Same situation on Amazon. Grrrr. I posted about it on Facebook all, "Uh, anyone every heard of this band? Do the suck? WTF?" and as I was hoping, one of my much-hipper-than-me, musically inclined friends answered and made some suggestions.

So, I headed to Youtube where I listened to the entire album.

...Whoa. The album consists of three long, instrumental sections: "The Dead Flag Blues," "East Hastings" and "Providence." The first track opens with a long, ominous tone and a spoken word monologue about...I don't know. The end of the world or something. IT'S REALLY FUCKING CREEPY. But also incredibly compelling. Each section sort of builds on itself. I could hear echoes of the section I liked so much from "East Hastings" in the earlier track. Throughout the album is the use of ambient noises and spoken word and many different musical influences from a country/bluegrass twang to straight up rock and a smoother, more classical sound.

It was, oddly, a really emotionally visceral experience. I was creeped out and sort of felt like I was going to cry at several points. Not because the music was sad. I guess because it was so complex and evoked so many contradictory emotions. I don't know, I think I'm sounding really pretentious here and not meaning to. Heh.

When I got to "East Hastings," I was all psyched because I'd found the first section so interesting. It was aaaaawesome. (Except for the end. I hated that part, but more on that later.) That rock bit is just so slammin' it's like I can't hold my body still when I hear it. I have to MOVE. Though the section ended with a long section of static. I hate that. The sound of static just really, really wigs me out. I think I blame The Ring, but whatever.

I know nothing about the culture surrounding this band, I don't know if they're like, a pretentious hipster band or whatever. But I really liked this album. Yaaaaay!

Movie Review: "Repo! The Genetic Opera"

So. It's probably well-known 'round these parts that I develop these single-minded obsessions about movies, books, tv shows, bands and then devour them and drive everyone around me crazy nattering on and on about them.

Yeah. Sorry about that. Whatever. Look, I'm annoying, but I'm self-aware. At least I don't do drugs, right? RIGHT?!

Anyway, Pong has been spamming me for weeks with clips from some movie he wants me to watch. And I've been sort of ignoring him because I'm a bitch, whatever. But he IMs me a clip one night and says, "Look! It's Giles from Buffy singing!" and I'm like, "*sigh* Fiiiiiiiiiine. I'll watch it" and it was the song "Night Surgeon" from the movie Repo! The Genetic Opera.

WHERE HAS THIS MOVIE BEEN ALL MY LIFE?

Honestly, I can't figure out why I hadn't heard of it until now! It's a HORROR MOVIE MUSICAL starring Giles from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, only my favorite show EVER. Let me say that again: A HORROR MOVIE MUSICAL. I love horror movies! I love musicals! I turned Sorcha on to it because I knew it was her kind of thing. Actually, I watched the movie when I was home sick with a really bad cold. I lost my voice and this didn't stop me. I stalked Sorcha at work (we work together) and handed her a note that said, "Repo! The Genetic Opera. Seen it?" and that was all it took!

So, Repo! is a total cult film sent in a Blade Runner-esque future where massive organ failures have decimated the human race. A company, GeneCo, offers organ transplants but if you miss too many payment, they send a Repo Man to take back their property. Probably killing you dead. One of our main characters is a young girl named Shilo (Yes, that is the little girl from Spy Kids). Her father, played by Giles, is the aforementioned Repo Man, but she doesn't know this, of course. Shilo is sheltered due to a vague but apparently life-threatening illness but yearns to escape. There's an awesome drug dealer, GraveRobber, who is my new movie boyfriend, I don't care HOW grody he might be. Paris Hilton plays a spoiled, plastic-surgery addicted tramp. And she's really good in the role, make of that what you will... Sarah Brightman of Phantom of the Opera fame plays a blind opera singer. And it all comes to a wonderfully bloody conclusion!

So, yeah, eclectic cast. And it's GORY. DELIGHTFULLY GORY. I LOVE IT SO. And funny! And LUDICROUS. And hilariously goth and aware of its own ridiculousness but fully embracing it. The music is rockin', I downloaded the soundtrack and listen to it constantly. Heh. So, I appreciate it on a camp level but I also love it unironically. I enjoy what I see as the film's criticism of large corporations and the need for healthcare reform. I am moved by Shilo's feminist awakening in her realization that she needs to make her own way in the world and her overprotective father is keeping her down. The lyrics of her last song in the film "Genetic Emancipation" almost bring me to tears: "I've mistaken for destiny/but the truth is my legacy is not up to my genes/Though the imprint is deep in me/It will always be up to me." *sob*

So, yeah. Good stuff. Highly recommended!

So...What Have You Been Up To Lately?

Who, me? Well, lately I've been a bit busy. Sid and Andie had their third child at the end of last month! Another boy who we will call New Baby because that is what his older brothers Conan and Mothra call him. And I find that HILARIOUS. So, I was out there visiting them. We had fun playing Wii late at night. As ever, both Sid and Andie TROUNCED me at Tetris. But I railed them both at Mario Bros. so that was a good time. And they made me watch several episodes of Blackadder and I fell in LOVE with the show and um...Rowan Atkinson. No one told me that he is stone-cold foxy in the second series of that show. It was quite shocking!

Mame has some delightful news for you all, but I'll let her tell you when she gets a chance!

I've been devouring movies, television and books lately. Here's a quick round-up (Another blog post concerning my most recent obsession will follow shortly):

• Iron Man 2: loved it. I thought it was better than the first film! I'm not notably a Scarlet Johansson fan but that scene where she walks down that hallway, KICKING ASS almost had me in tears at it's awesomeness.
  
• The Ghost Writer: it was fine. A nifty, well-crafted little thriller. Ewan McGregor showed his ass, AS USUAL. If you can square it with your conscience to go see a Roman Polanksi film, check it out.
  
• Twilight and New Moon with the RiffTrax commentary. OH MY GOD. HILARITY. I highly, highly recommend them. I watched it with Sorcha and a bunch of friends and my stomach hurt from laughing.
• Just read the latest Sookie Stackhouse book, Dead in the Family and it was awesome as usual. Could have been filthier though. Alas. I can't wait for the next season of the show.
  
• I'm currently reading an awesome zombie book called Feed by Mira Grant. Love, love, LOVE it. I'm about halfway through and if you like zombies, and really. Who doesn't? Check it out.
  
• Treme, Justified and Doctor Who continue to be great.
• Michael Sheen continues to be hot.

What have you been watching/reading/devouring lately?

You Know You're Getting Old When...

As the title of this blog stipulates, I have now officially noticed I am getting older.

• Is it that I'm in my 9th month of my 2nd pregnancy? No.
  
• Is it my impending 8 year wedding anniversary? No.
  
• Is it my new 30 year mortgage?

No. It's this:

"Witty, insightful, and full of random allusions to their varied interests, "Two Jersey Girls" is an award-winning blog about everything and nothing. Two twenty-something women write about what's in the news, movies, television, and their lives. An entertaining read, updated regularly, and quoted often."

That's right - the header of this very blog. Notice why I'm old? It needs to be updated. No longer can it read, "Two twenty-something women..." because we're both over 30 now. OVER 30!!

It seems like just yesterday Bea and I decided to start this thing. It was long before Twitter, back when MySpace was the cool networking-site, (back when Bea flat-out refused to use said MySpace), back when I was celebrating my first son's first birthday. It was before the insane move that ended up taking two years, before we had a black president, before we realized just how parallel the war in the Middle East is with the Vietnam "Conflict." So much has changed. I wonder where we'll be when I have to change the header to "Two forty-something women..."

Hang on...I'm getting dizzy...

Book/Movie Review: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo"

I kept hearing about this book The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, on NPR, in Entertainment Weekly, pretty much anywhere that might conceivably talk about books. So, I hopped onto my local library's website and reserved it. ...And was like, #74 in line for it. I think I waited two months!

I finally got my grubby little hands on the book, started it...and was promptly bored senseless. The first three to four chapters of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo are really kinda boring. IT GETS A LOT BETTER, FOR REAL. Once you meet the titular tattooed girl, Lisbeth Salander, you're hooked. The book starts with several chapters about the libel trial of journalist Mikael Blomkvist. He's going down in a pretty big way, but it's also pretty boring because you don't know shit about him to start and also. Libel? Unless it's scandalous (and this isn't, it's like corporate financial shit), it's pretty fucking dull. So, whatever. He's a decent guy though and needs to find a new job because he's lost about all his journalistic cred. When he gets out of prison, a rich man, Henrik Vanger (And yes, I totally had to use my copy of the book to correctly spell all these names, ok?) hires Blomkvist to look into the disappearance and probable murder of his beloved niece Harriet 40 years ago. At first, Blomkvist is like, "...No," but then figures he really doesn't have anything better to do and takes the job. And starts digging into the past and trying to unravel the mystery of Harriet's disappearance and along the way, learning just how FUCKED UP the Vanger family is. 'Cause...damn.

So, ok, that's the A storyline, for the most part. LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT LISBETH SALANDER. SHE IS SO GREAT. She is tiny and mean and brilliant and pierced and tattooed and fierce and utterly vicious when crossed. She is a great character. As soon as she showed up, I was like, "HELLO. NOW WE'RE TALKING." Salandar is an awesome ass-kicking heroine and I am a girl who appreciates such things. NOW. NO MORE ABOUT THE PLOT. THERE ARE TWISTS AND MYSTERIES AND I SHAN'T GIVE THEM AWAY.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is part of the Millenium trilogy. The second book The Girl Who Played with Fire is already out and has been devoured by me. (I liked it, but I liked the first one better!) And the third book The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest will be out in May. (ALREADY OUT IN OTHER COUNTRIES INCLUDING BRITAIN. AND IF YOU THINK I DIDN'T CONSIDER ORDERING IT FROM AMAZON UK, YOU ARE SORELY MISTAKEN. Ahem.) The author Stieg Larsson apparently had plans for a 10-book epic series but died of Mysterious Circumstances after finishing book three. HMMMM. "Mysterious Circumstances" because he was a journalist who did a lot of investigating and writing into asshole neo-Nazi groups and was a relatively young man who randomly dropped dead. Draw your own conclusions there, people.

Mom and I both really enjoyed the books so when we heard there was a well-received film make of the first book, we were so there!

Ok, allow me to rant: The ONLY reason that I heard about the film adaptation was because I listen to BBC radio. It has not been advertised at ALL in the U.S. and barely talked about by film reviewers here. Ebert reviewed it, the print version of Entertainment Weekly did not (though I just cancelled my subscription because that magazine is total bullshit and has been for years now), my beloved Peter Travers of Rolling Stone did (I can't link it because the website is being weird) and I saw no previews for it on television. Not even on BBC America. This is total bullshit. I know there's an American remake in the works but I have no interest in it. This original Swedish version is so awesome. I know, I sound like an Annoying Douchebag Hipster who's all, "Welll, I like the FOREIGN FILM BETTER, YOU PLEBE. You just don't appreciate REAL CINEMA." But the assumption that people from the U.S. don't want to watch foreign/subtitled films BUGS THE SHIT OUT OF ME. With a good subtitled film, you totally forget that it's subtitled. Your brain starts to put the dialogue and subtitles together and you don't even notice it after awhile. And The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo is very, very good. It gets all the important elements of the book*, condenses the rest and the performances are AWESOME.

*However, be warned: both the book AND the movie contain some pretty graphic scenes of sexual violence. In the film, it goes on so long I started looking off to the side of the screen and hoping for a fade-to-black. If that kind of things upsets you, take a bathroom break, for real.