My Obsession With "The Terminator" Series or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned To Love The Robot

HA! I started this back when Terminator: Salvation was in the theaters. I suck. Sorry! Mame and I will try to get back to regular posting again soon. We've both been so busy! SORRY.

So, there's a new Terminator movie out! Yay! I am a total FREAK for the Terminator movies (Well, for the first two movies, anyway). The way some people are about Star Trek? I'm that way about The Terminator. I first saw The Terminator when I was about 6 years old. It made quite an impression on me and remains to this day, my favorite movie. Unfortunately, I am ridiculously geeky about it and am fiercely protective of the characters. I managed about half of one episode of The Sarah Connor Chronicles because turning it off because it didn't fit into my view of that particular fictional universe. I know, I know. (But...BUT!!! John Connor is NOT a whiny little bitch! Kyle Reese did NOT have a BROTHER. Sarah Connor would NOT shack up with Ryan O'Reily, OK.)

Sorry about that. Anyway, The Terminator is a sci-fi action film set in the early 80s. Linda Hamilton plays Sarah Connor, a regular girl with a crappy waitressing job and a jerk boyfriend. (Later in the series, it's stated that Sarah is 19 years old. Which I'll go with that since the movie tells me so, but Hamilton was a good 10 years older than that when they made the film. Just sayin'.) She's not especially tough or ass-kicking. She's cute and funny and nice and has a hilarious 80s shag haircut. But that's about it. But there are two men looking for her, one a giant Austrian bodybuilder (Played by Arnold Schwarzenegger) and the other an intense blond guy a trench coat and messy hair (Paging EGT! More about him later, I promise). Both men are dodgy and heavily armed. We see that the enormous Austrian is killing all the ladies in the phone book named Sarah Connor. This is not looking good for our girl.

So, after many bullets fly and several women mistaken for Sarah Connor are dead, the hot blond guy (Did I forget to mention that he is HOT?) finds Sarah and saves her life. His name is Kyle Reese and he's a soldier sent from the future to protect her. The guy trying to kill her is a Terminator, a metal robot wearing a person suit, also sent from the future. She has been "targeted for termination" because she will give birth to John Connor who will lead the human revolution in the war against the machines. Sarah is understandably dubious regarding this turn of events. But Kyle convinces her and they go on to kick ass, our girl Sarah finding all sorts of reserves of strength and awesomeness that she didn't know she had.

It's SUCH a great movie; tightly plotted, action-packed, well-written and suspenseful. There is not an ounce of fat on this screenplay, everything that is in it is there for a reason. It handles the time travel aspect extremely well and in an innovative way. Also, there is quite a bit of exposition that has to be delivered and I feel like it's done really well. There's tons of information that the viewer needs to know about this particular apocalyptic future and that could get boring fast and it doesn't. As for the Terminator effects...well. It WAS made 25 years ago (DAMN. 25 YEARS AGO?!) and you kind of have to make allowances for that. But the Terminator endoskeleton is still TERRIFYING.

Sarah Connor and Kyle Reese are great characters. Kyle Reese was my first love, seriously, when I was a little girl. He's tough, hot, smart, TOTALLY BADASS and not afraid to defer to a woman or allow her to take charge. (I appreciated similar qualities in another character that Michael Biehn played, Cpl. Hicks in Aliens. Call me, Michael Biehn*!) Kyle protects Sarah and teaches her how to blow shit up, but never condescends to her. It's awesome.

And Sarah Connor. Oh, Sarah Connor, you have been the pinnacle of badass women for over 25 years. You have shown sexually confused girls the way toward happy bisexualism (...so I've heard). You are the perfect balance of mother/warrior. That's one of the best things about Sarah. She's not just famous for giving birth to The Legend John Connor. She didn't just gestate him and then hand him over to like, a team of ninjas. She raised him and taught him all his badass robot-destroying skills. And she was just a regular girl before the Terminator showed up on her doorstep. She didn't now how to load a gun or blow up a warehouse or steal a credit card. She learned, taught her son and then he will save the world.

Now, I know some people will insist that Terminator 2 is the superior movie. To those people, I say, "BAH." The effects are superior and they are still pretty damned astonishing. But there're some plot holes there and too much Arnold and it's just, to me, not as good at the first. The third movie was...better than I expected. It's not awesome, but it's not terrible either. There's a really interesting story there about John Connor living off the grid, as a homeless dude because he's totally adrift that his life's mission has been averted. Unfortunately, that's not the story the filmmaker wanted to tell. Alas.

I can't wait for Terminator: Salvation to come out on DVD! Christian Bale and Sam Worthington! WOOOO!

*I met Michael Biehn at a horror con over the summer. I know, I'm a total nerd. It was pretty great. He was really nice and I managed not to be creepy at him. Success!

So. Um. Wow, Where Does The Time Go?

Oh, I'll TELL you where it goes...it goes into Facebook, the world's biggest time suck ever. Seriously, if there is an American Gods-ish Facebook god, I am keeping it very well-fed. I blame Mame for this. Apparently, everyone I've ever met in my life is on there. Good times.

Hmmm...what's been going on around here? Made it back from vacation with the family on the Outer Banks. Hey, did you know that the Chesapeake Bay Bridge-Tunnel is 23 miles long? A little PSA from me to you. So that when you are driving across it, you won't look around to see your car entirely surrounded by water with no end in sight and ask your mother, "Uh...how long IS this thing*?" to have her airily say, "Oh, 20 miles?" You're welcome! Actually, it was sort of fun, like driving a roller coaster.

It's very pretty on the Outer Banks. A bit buggy this year. Everyone from the island seemed extremely apologetic about that fact. I was all, "Whatev, I'm from Jersey, as least these mosquitos doesn't give you mutant superpowers, AMIRITE?!"

I got a large proportion of my family watching True Blood. My mom brought her season 1 DVDs down and I hectored Bri into watching them because Bri, as she would say, "loves that hot vampire shit." Yeah, I don't want to know either. She loved it: predictable. Not so predictable? My uncles Claudius and Jazz and teenage cousin *** (Because I am TOTALLY blanking on a nome de blog for him right now. Someone help me out with that?) were all into it too. Heh.

We watched lots of movies too. The uncles were appalled that I'd never seen The Big Lebowski and set to remedy that straightaway. I liked it; it was very amusing and confounding. I'm not prepared to start a RELIGION around it the way some people seem to be, but it was fun. I brought The Midnight Meat Train with me, thinking it would be fun to watch with Uncle Jazz because he's a big horror movie buff like me. He'd already seen it but consented to watching it again with me and Bri. AHAHAHAHAHAHA! That movie is HILARIOUS. It's not good, but it's not terrible either. It's plenty gory and has some good kills and wacky camera angles. Bradley Cooper is SMOKIN' HOT as always. I recommend it but only if you are a hardcore horror fan. The story is ridiculous and the characters do things that make no sense and the ending -- AHAHAHAHAHA! Then we watched Slither, which Homer has been after me since forever to watch. It was pretty great. I love Nathan Fillion.

I've been going to the movies quite a bit this summer. It's one of my favorite things to do and there's been a pretty good selection this year. I've seen:

• Public Enemies with Sorcha. It was good times, Johnny Depp was MADE for that kind of period dress. See? The movie itself is overlong, but good. LOTS of gunfire. SO MANY BULLETS. Christian Bale was hot too, once you get past the fact that his character is named "Melvin Purvis." Was there ever an unsexier name? I think not.
  
• Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: It's a good movie and I liked it. I don't have a whole lot to say about it like I don't have a whole lot to say about the book. The book is sort of a place-holder and so is the movie. I will say that I continue to be sort of confused by the pacing of these movies. They leave out SO MUCH, which is understandable since the books are a million pages long. But then they make up stuff that wasn't in the books when they could just...use stuff that they left out. I don't know? And sometimes stuff they leave in doesn't seem nearly as important as what they leave out. Like, the whole Ron/Lavendar subplot goes on for WAY too long. I mean, yeah, it's amusing and gives Rupert Grint a chance to be goofy and Dumbledore a funny line, but really? And the half-blood prince thing is barely covered? Ok.
  
• (500) Days of Summer; I was totally psyched for this the first time I saw the preview. I adore Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Zooey Deschanel. I love quirky romances. They played a couple in Manic, a film I adore and I was pleased to see them play one again. I love The Smiths. (Although, really. Who doesn't?) THEN, I FOUND OUT. SPENCER REID IS IN IT, YOU GUYS. DONE. It's a really cute movie, you should go see it. SPENCER REID!!! Ahem.
• The Hurt Locker: the best movie I've seen all year. Honestly, I can't imagine another movie being better. I DEMAND Academy Award nominations for Kathryn Bigelow, Anthony Mackie and most of all, Jeremy Renner. One one hand, it's an intense, suspenseful action movie where lots of shit gets blown up and hot men are being stoic and competent. (Seriously, Ralph Fiennes has a cameo and I've never seen him look hotter.) On the other hand, it's this heart-breaking look at the effects of war and its costs. These soldiers are in life-threatening situations at every moment. They literally have to kill or be killed. A split-second hesitation or minor misreading of a situation could cost them or their fellow soldiers their lives. Your son/daughter/brother/sister/whatever wants to join the military? Make them watch this movie first. The last ten minutes felt like a kick to the stomach.

*That's what she said!

Summer Movie Round-Up

I've been inspired by the lovely, ginger and only occasionally rude Sorcha's driveby post of summer movie reviews. This has been a great summer for movies! I've seen a million already!

• Star Trek: LOVED IT. I was never a huge fan of the television show, I liked The Next Generation but that was it. More of a Battlestar Galactica girl over here, you know? But this is a terrific movie. Awesome cast, great script, fun storyline. The "twist" they use to differentiate this iteration of films from the original series is nothing short of brilliant. If this ends up being Leonard Nimoy's final appearance as Spock, I think that's ok. It's a lovely, intelligent, dignified performance. (I know people were bummed about Shatner not having a role in the new film, but seriously. I don't see him showing up and being dignified. Do you?) I plan to drag Mame and BW to see it this weekend even though neither of them like sci fi. Also, I wept through the first 10 minutes. For the next movie, however? MORE SIMON PEGG. ALWAYS MORE SIMON PEGG.
  
• X-Men Origins: Wolverine: A decent movie. Good action sequences, fun performances from everyone. I didn't expect a whole lot and was pleasantly surprised. I loved Ryan Reynolds, but then I ALWAYS love his smartass schtick. And Hugh Jackman is truly a humanitarian. These are troubled times and the only way he can help is by removing his shirt. And he does. A lot. And the slightest provocation. And the world is a better place for it. Thanks, Hugh!
• Terminator Salvation: Loved it. Saw it twice. Apparently, I'm the only one, but that's ok. Christian Bale was pretty great and a total BAD ASS. And I loved Bryce Dallas Howard's steely Earth mama routine. And helloooo Sam Worthington. I didn't think anyone was allowed to be hotter than Christian Bale but I stand corrected! And I adored Anton Yelchin as Kyle Reese and that's no small feat. Kyle Reese was my first love and I am VERY protective of him. And Yelchin was pretty great in Star Trek as well. Good for him! (My epic Terminator post is still in the works, I promise!)
  
• Drag Me To Hell: HA! This was a ton of fun. It was pure, old school Sam Raimi and I loved every second. It was completely disgusting and hilarious and made me jump out of my seat and screech more times that I can count.
  
• Up: I think I've made my thoughts on this movie clear. The most wonderful movie ever.
• The Hangover: SO. GODDAMN. FUNNY. Zach Galifinakis is practically a national treasure* and Bradley Cooper needs to show up to decorate every movie. Mame, BW and I have been quoting this movie at each other for weeks now.
  
• Away We Go: Lovely, lovely movie. Funny and sweet and full of great performances. I want you all to know that Mame cried. (Mame! The dad with all the adopted kids was played by the same guy who played Lawyer Ted on Six Feet Under. That's where we knew him from!)

What movies have you seen so far this summer?

*Why isn't "Between Two Ferns" a real show? I'd watch it every week! Though Mame will be amused to know that I still found the one with Michael Cera too uncomfortable to watch a second time. I tried! I couldn't do it! STOP TICKLING HIM.

Summer Film Series...GO!

So, Mame and I decided a fun thing to do this summer in between us hanging out for many, many hours and creating havoc on our hometown (Can't wait until you get here!!!) would be to have a Summer Film Series on the blog. Doesn't that sound awesome and pretentious?! What it really means is that we are going to do a bunch of movie-related posts. For my part, I'm planning the following:

• My Obsession With "The Terminator" Series (I'm going to work on this one tonight!)
• My 5 Favorite Indie Movies
• Why Fairuza Balk Is Awesome And How You Should Love Her
• Movies That I Hate And Why

Sounds fun, right? Last year's Summer Reading Challenge was a success, so we figured we'd try something new this year. (For the record, Mame finished all 9 Little House books and I only made it through book 3 of the Avonlea series. So I guess she wins that one. Whatever.)