Where've you been all my life...

...said the one month old with a laptop and an inkling for crude humor.

Well here is what I have been up to these last few weeks:

• Thanksgiving in West Virginia. It snowed! Be jealous.
• Agnes had a kidney stone and it might as well have rained fire and brimstone for the way my extended family reacted. The whole world stopped. I, of course, did not, but was heavily criticised under many people's breath. Newsflash: I don't care.
• December has come, and with it comes everyone that I love's birthday. Dolly, Stewie (her son), Glow Bug, and of course - my own. Oh. And Jesus.
• Beau and I have decided to have Christmas in our own home this year because we never have before. This means that a lot of family are coming in to visit which means that Beau and I are cleaning, a lot. Through out the year, despite many attempts to behave differently, we are pack rats. Now as the season of giving (and receiving!) approaches we are going room by room and decluttering. We've done three rooms and so far have given more to Goodwill than I think anyone could believe. We're talking truckloads. The house looks great, but it makes me think what it looks like the rest of the year. Dolly has made fun of me for starting "Now?" to clean for an event two weeks away; if only she knew!
• I have once again renewed my anger at the local "All Christmas Music All the Time" radio station for playing that ridiculous song about a little child at a drug store trying to buy his mother a pair of shoes or a cure for cancer or some shit like that. I'll be honest I don't really listen, because I'm either sobbing or angrily lunging for the 'off' button. I can't stand songs that are sad just to be sad. A sweet love song that makes me cry? Fine. A ballad of a significant event with weird underlying sexual tones? OK by me. But sad just to make you cry? F that. Unless you're talking about "In the Ghetto" by Elvis. But c'mon, that's Elvis.
• Old 1950's Christmas movies that I loved as a child and can now mock openly about the blatant sexism, homo-eroticism, and other unpolitically correctness. It makes for a fun hour every night. Thank you, ABC Family!!

Other than that, I've been busily planning Lady Bea's trip for New Year's Eve, and working.

More to come as the month passes me by.