Shameful Confessions, Part Deux

Everyone. I have something that I have to tell you. Something SHOCKING. Something SHAMEFUL. Mame and I...are addicts. ADDICTS FOR CELEBRITY REHAB. YES, *THAT* Celebrity Rehab. WAIT. DON'T GO. Let me explain!

I know you won't believe me when I say this and I certainly don't blame you, but it's really good! You'd think since it's on VH1, home of The Surreal Life and that show with Scott Baio, that it would be really trashy and exploitative and gross. And ok, it sort of is, but it's also compelling and sometimes touching and you really ROOT for these people. I totally want all of them to stop doing whatever destructive thing it is that they are doing and make better lives for themselves. Yeah, there's a little voyeuristic thrill in watching semi-famous people scrape rock bottom, but it's impossible not to feel for them and think there but for the grace, you know?

And then there's Dr. Drew. OH MY GOD. Is he HOT or what? And so...smart! And competent! He rolls his sleeves up and shows off his manly forearms! And he makes the BEST WTF? faces and also The Eyebrows of Stern Compassion and The Head Tilt of "You're Totally Lying to Me and I Will Make You Admit It, Then Forgive You." He's the greatest. Mame and I totally love and remember him from his Loveline days. Remember? He gave such good advice! (Hey, did you guys know that My Chemical Romance was totally on that show? I, um, heard that somewhere. Shut up. Never mind.) Anyway, we like him a lot.

And we LOVE the bitchy nurse, Shelly. I love her snotty little asides and how she totally intimidates even the giant Ultimate Fighter. Not so fond of the rehab counselor guy, I don't know his name, but he bugs me. We want to take Brigitte Nielson to go see the new Rambo movie and mock it. She rules! Popcorn and Raisinets are on us!

I watch the show with my mom and brother. Mame and I text during the show and call each other during commercials. It's all very unhealthy, but SO FUN. A highlight of last night was putting Mame on speaker phone so we could explain My Fair Brady to my mother. She'd never heard of it and the look of horror on her face was PRICELESS. Heheheh. Sorry Mom!