Get Out of My HOUSE...Boogedy boogedy BOO!

Hey, do you guys believe in ghosts? Um. No, me neither...except...I kinda do. My dad, Homer has always maintained that his friend Moe lived in a haunted house. They've been friends since they were kids and it's the house Moe grew up in. Moe inherited the house when his parents retired or whatever. And while Homer was living there, I'd get regular updates on ghostly goings-on. I never really believed it. I mean, I believed that THEY believed it, but remained pretty skeptical. I'm all Scully like that, I guess. Heh.

Anyway. Homer had a bunch of us over for a barbecue one afternoon: his nieces and nephews, me, my mom and BW. We're all hanging out in the yard, watching the kids play in the pool, drinking beer and stuffing our faces. I go into the house to use the bathroom. After I finish up, (YES, I washed my HANDS) I go to the exit the little, first-floor bathroom. I grab the doorknob and start turning it and it STOPS, like someone on the other side of the door is holding it. I try to rattle it; it won't budge. Naturally, I assume it's either BW or one of Homer's nephews, messing with me. I fiddle with the door for a minute or two, but then start to get annoyed. "OK, ASSHOLE. Stop messing around and LET! ME! OUT!" (I'm super-classy, even with with family) Suddenly, the doorknob just turns. Like the person holding it had let go. The door swings open...and there is no one in the house. No brother or cousin teasing me. The house is totally empty. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

I walk outside and must have kind of a funny look on my face. Homer looks up from the grill, "What's wrong, BB?" I tell the assembled party the story, kind of jokingly, waiting for someone to 'fess up and tell me that they had been the one who locked me in the bathroom, knowing that there's really no way that they could have without me seeing them, given the layout of the house. Unless someone in my family is a spy. Or ninja. One of the nephew's girlfriend's suddenly looks at me accusingly.

Girlfriend: Did someone TELL you to say that?! Are you messing with me?! [glares at her boyfriend]
Bea: Um, no.
GF: Because the exact same thing happened to me the other day! I was totally freaked out!

Unconcerned by all the drama, Homer resumes grilling, "Yeah, 'he' does that a lot. Especially to girls." Wow, ok.

Homer has told me tons of stories about that ghost: watching the toilet paper spin off the roll with no one touching it, hearing footsteps when alone in the house, seeing a man with a hat out of the corner of his eye, etc. I didn't witness any of those creepy incidences. But, I totally stand by this one. If someone can give me a rational explanation, I'll hear it. But I don't think there is one! On that note, Happy Halloween!

*Extra points to anyone who gets the reference in the title! No, not you, Mom. I KNOW you'll know that one.